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Thursday, April 13, 2017

UPPER CLASS WHITE MEN A BUNCH OF SCUMBAGS? YOU DECIDE!

Do some white men just not get it?

I think it is particularly typical of some self-centered, upper class, white men that they often think of their wives as spoiled and pampered because they have absolutely zero clue regarding what is involved in growing successful, well rounded, ethical human beings.

Doing so is an incredibly demanding task both spiritually, intellectually, and physically, and it is an occupation that does not merely cease once these young people hit 18. As any hands on Mom knows, we are continuing to support, bolster, craft, mold, engage, facilitate and enhance these young people as human beings and as contributing members of society well into their 20s if not 30s and on.


Nonetheless, some upper class white men continue to believe that anyone can bring up their child, and they just grow like flowers in the sun shine, and that if they are left alone day after day after school or brought up by the housekeeper or given tons of money, things will be just fine. Well, no, this is not what happens. We have an opiod epidemic here in CT which particularly impacts young people and the wealthier communities are not immune.

Why is this so?



Because of the abuses of a few self-centered upper class white men who continue to abuse and disrespect their ex-wives, who seize custody of their children in custody disputes using their superior social and economic resources, and ultimately scar and damage their children for life. Taking their cue from the book "Screw the Bitch" which is wildly popular among such men, they use every nefarious tactic it advises to screw their ex-wives and the mothers of their children in family court. The end result is the deconstruction of our families and communities combined with a substantial increase in promiscuity and crime.

Further, some,  but not all, upper class white men disgrace themselves by their resentment of any intelligent woman, their resentment of any woman who is financially well off, and their desire to get revenge on such women not only with the judicial system but in a broad range of services in CT such as the insurance and financial industries.  Such attitudes I have found quite striking and widespread, particularly here in CT. Men like this harbor the presumption that women who have attained status over a period of years must have achieved these results by being spoiled and pampered. What they don't realize is that a considerable number of women like this are highly educated and hard working, and they have tough fighting spirits, specifically because they worked harder than most to get where they are today.

Nevertheless, as a victim of the CT Family Court system, and now an advocate, I do continue to see this ongoing prejudice and hatred of women among CT professional men. This misogyny, that leads even Judges in family court, who are sworn to be fair and just, to make disparaging comments about the women who appear before them and to deride them for their economic and scholarly success, is particularly appalling.

Of course, the men who act and speak in this manner often had mothers who were highly successful at raising them, often have their own wives and daughters whose achievements they benefit from. Still, they can't help being nasty sons of guns who seek to oppress women and subject them to the will of other abusive men whenever possible. 

While these men are having their fun, and chortling, and being gleeful about the damage they have and continue to inflict, they never think about future consequences, and there will be consequences.  In the end, these very same men will pay for their actions in the dysfunction of their own lives, in the mental health and substance abuse addictions of their children, and in the loss of the love and affection of those closest to them.

Just some final thoughts to leave you with. These upper class white men who abuse their ex wives actually believe that their children will never figure  out what they have done, but the amazing fact is that, sooner or later, most children will.  



It is also true that, even if it turns out that the mother was flawed, or that she did make mistakes, that doesn't stop children from continuing to care, from continuing to be loyal, and from continuing to love.  Think of the lost Indian boy, Saroo Brierly, who took 25 years to track his mother down, and was finally able to succeed using google earth.  P.D. Eastman's book, "Are You My Mother?" about a little lost baby bird who goes on a journey to find his mother continues to have mass appeal among children's books.  Why?  Because finding your way back home to mother is the most primitive, the most basic drive that all human beings have hard wired into their hearts and minds.

And for those of you who are Catholics just consider that 59% of the physical layer of the rosary references the Virgin Mary, and a billion Christians pray to her every year.  Without the gift of Mary, there would be no salvation in Jesus Christ.  So if self-centered, upper class white men think that excluding the mother from the life of the family makes sense, they are kidding themselves and they are unbiblical.

Any men who disparage the value of mothers and of motherhood, I believe, will pay the price in the end, most likely by destroying any legacy they might have had to pass on to the next generation.  What is worse is that, by the time they figure it out, it will be too late to correct the harm and damage that has been done.

12 comments:

  1. I wish I had your faith, but sadly, these men seem to be particularly good at destroying the children's love and respect for their mother.

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    1. I don't so much have faith as I believe in the individual journey of every human being. There are many layers of truth to the situations that we each face in life and we do not truly understand our parents often until decades have gone by. To a certain extent, what we do as parents is raise them, and once that task has been achieved, then we have to let them go to fly. If we have done a good enough job, for the better part, they eventually return and we can enjoy the people that they have become. Otherwise, children are not there to meet our needs; they are there to meet their needs. Over time, life generally has the impact of educating young people regarding the reality of the life they have lived and the relationships they have had. It may not happen on our time as parents, but it often happens at the right time for our children. As parents, there is no better approach to a lost child other than continuing to be the admirable human beings we always were, so that our children have parents of substance to return to when the time is right. The worst response a parent can have is to live up the denigrating parents negative prophecies and thereby eventually appear to justify the bad treatment directed towards you. That is a tough lesson to learn, but the right one. Of course, nothing in life is 100%, but as parents we need to do what's right to the very best of our ability. That begins with self care and forward.

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  2. I think you're fooling yourself. Some mother's, who by nature are supposed to love unconditionally and give of themselves selflessly to the benefit of their children, do not. Whether it is because of mental illness, drug and alcohol addiction or narcissistic personality disorder... there are many "mothers" in this fine state that have lost their children for very valid reasons. These men, that step up and do the right thing, that protect their children from these evil women should be applauded. It is these men that sacrifice and put themselves in between their children and these crazy women that are the true heroes. You can all go on and on about the judges, lawyers, GAL's being pedos to try to cover the real issue and that is that some mom's just don't give a shit and they would rather attack and condemn and claim "victim" rather than do the right thing and get well.

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    1. Just in general the safest place for children to be remains in the custody of their mothers. It isn't 100% but nothing ever is. 97% of psychopaths are men. Mothers also have more extensive support networks that they rely on for advice about parenting. They’re much more likely than fathers to turn to family members and friends and to take advantage of parenting resources such as books, magazines and online sources. For example, while 43% of moms say they turn to parenting websites, books or magazines at least sometimes for parenting advice, about a quarter (23%) of dads do the same. And moms are more than twice as likely as dads to say they at least occasionally turn to online message boards, listservs or social media for advice on parenting (21% vs. 9%). So overall, women simply do the job better than men. This website is full of well documented cases where women were falsely accused of mental illness, largely PAS, falsely accused of drug and alcohol addiction, and falsely accused of narcissistic personality disorders and denied access to their children on the basis of that. Usually, the abuser in these situations won custody of the children based upon court proceedings where the mother was denied due process as well as her constitutional rights. Until the CT Family Court takes this issue seriously, takes steps to examine the problem and root our its causes, i.e. within the corrupt legal and mental health professionals, any statements to the effect that abusive fathers are "doing the right thing" are simply laughable.

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    2. Your statement is laughable. Where is it proven that these women are falsely accused. Just saying you're falsely accused doesn't make it true. It's not proven at all. Just saying you're a victim doesn't make you a victim. Just saying you have a disability doesn't prove you have a disability. These women keep these cases running in the court system for years to try to prove they're not "f" ups, which further proves they are. Get Mental Help, Get Alcohol and Drug Counseling. Make yourself well before you can even think of parenting. These outrageous claims of being "falsely" accused are coming from these insane women themselves and the rest of the narcissists that love to support the insanity. Misery loves company. Men that rescue their children from these situations are HERO'S. Your statistics are meaningless. Many believe the CT Family Court gets it exactly right. Half the time judges tiptoe around these insane women in order to go overboard extending these women's right's when in fact they should get the book thrown at them, just as with Lori Thaner. I hope we see more of this from the CT Family Courts. Enough is enough!

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    3. Yes well, you can call my statement laughable, but I am very careful about looking at the evidence and making sure that there is solid evidence to state that serious mistakes occurred in a case. What is laughable is to in any way deny my statements that the problems in family court are severe. I wouldn't say that if I hadn't personally experienced misrepresentation after misrepresentation in my own case, and then if you read the memoranda of decision in other cases the inconsistencies and the lies just jump out at the page. The twisted logic that judges and attorney use, the outright misrepresentation of the facts, the abuse of court rules to eliminate vital evidence from court proceedings. It is appalling. Not only to I read about it, simply be taking a look at the documents, I have personally observed the coercion and the outright violation of due process and the constitution that takes place. I've already pointed out several troubling issues in the Lori Thaner case without even having the documents in front of me. I think that the statistics already show that the foxes are running the chicken house. 58,000 children per year placed in the hands of the men who have abused them. 80 % of abusers are able to seize full custody. It is disgraceful. Our legal system is totally out of control.

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    4. I've watched a few of these high conflict cases myself. Everything you're saying has been said before. It doesn't hold up, and it isn't the truth. All the allegations of abuse, and and wrongdoing is used as a smoke screen to divert the attention from the deficient "mother". I get it, you're one of them and you will stick to your guns, clearly you have the last word, it's your blog. But there's a whole population that do the right thing, follow the court orders, protect the children who remain silent. We remain silent because truth prevails, good prevails, always. I'm speaking out for that side, we're sick of the games, sick of the unfounded allegations of abuse and clearly the CT Family Court is sick of it as well. Work at something productive. It's amusing really that you all believe these sick lies you tell each other, what's more amusing is you expect sane people to believe it as well.

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    5. Catharine, you guys miss the point. the fact is that family court and civil court matters must be addressed in family or civil court, not criminal court. In the Thaner matter, it should never have gone to criminal court because it is not a family court matter.

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    6. I don't think that the CT Family court is sick of unfounded allegations of abuse since it makes hundreds of thousands of dollars racketeering off of these allegations. In addition, I have documented case after case where I found evidence of perjury, due process violations, constitutional violations, violations of court rules, stolen court documents, improper clerical actions, etc. etc. etc. all of which I have reported on this blog. If you think any of the statements I have made regarding each of these incidents is somehow not correct--I have never received any credible evidence to that effect. I have a filing cabinet full of backup documentation for each of the cases that I have discussed on this blog. I have now been doing this blog for seven years and reporting on all these violations and not a single judge, attorney, mental health professional, or GAL has come to me to say "you aren't telling the truth" and here is the proof. I have had readers correct minor problems, which I've followed up on, but that is pretty much the extent of it when it comes to error. Court people have threatened me with lawsuits for "inciting violence"--they have dragged me to court to bear witness as to the sources of my information, but I've never faced any challenge to any of the facts I've reported on the cases I've discussed on this blog. You are sick of the games? Well you created them. You are sick of the unfounded allegations of abuse? Well you made them. You call us insane, well, shall I say your sanity isn't looking too good to me at the moment. Of course, this is the psychopathic mentality, to accuse others of what they themselves have done. To project their own weaknesses and character flaws onto others. So what this comment shows by its very nature is that the author of it doesn't have a very savory character.

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  3. http://wp.me/p8ANvD-l

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  4. https://familycourtcircusblog.wordpress.com/2017/05/16/robert-thaner/

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  5. Cathy you are amazing. Never ever ever give up on bravely telling the truth. Connecticut needs more voices like yours.

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