WHEN IT COMES TO CUSTODY, FATHERHOOD FUNDED ACCESS AND VISITATION GRANTS PUT FATHERS IN THE DRIVERS' SEAT!

(This article is written by an author who chooses to write anonymously in order to protect him/herself from retaliation.)

All over the State of Connecticut mothers are talking about how Family Court disregards their concerns and actively engages in schemes which are intended to deny them the custody of their children.  Why is this happening, they ask?  

For some answers, all you need to do is look at a recent Superior Court Federal Access and Visitation grant application from July 7, 2010 which demonstrates how pro-father case rigging goes down in Connecticut.  Programs like this, funded by the federal government are meant to arbitrarily increase the number of noncustodial parents [fathers] who have "access" to their children.  

Thus, the grant application begins with the words, "I am pleased to submit Connecticut's renewal application for available federal funds to administer programs that support and facilitate non-custodial parents' [fathers]access and visitation with their children." 

THE TENTACLES OF FATHERHOOD FUNDING ARE EVERYWHERE!

Fatherhood funds are not just distributed to fathers in grant programs intended for family court such as the one I am reviewing in this article, they are also distributed elsewhere.  For example, the grant application makes reference to a major program "within the Department of Social Services called the John S. Martinez Fatherhood Initiatve of Connecticut."  For more information on this program check the following link:

http://www.ct.gov/fatherhood/site/default.asp 

According to the grant, "The goal of the program is to promote positive involvement and interaction of fathers with their children.  This program oversees six state-certified fatherhood programs across Connecticut and is funded by state funding and the Promoting Responsible Fatherhood federal grant."  While I have not yet had an opportunity to review this grant, I am assuming the latter involves millions and millions of dollars solely provided to fathers.

But do not be deceived, this fatherhood funding doesn't simply involve the Department of Social Services.  A Memorandum of Understanding which I just obtained indicates that fatherhood funding provides millions of additional dollars for fatherhood programs in Connecticut operated by not only the Department of Social Services, but also by the Department of Children and Families, the Department of Correction, the Department of Labor, the Department of Mental health and Addiction Services, the Department of Public health, the State Department of Education, the Judicial Branch Court Support Services Division, and the Judicial Branch Support Enforcement Services. 

We are talking about these millions of dollars being siphoned into every aspect of State government agencies and services, and all of these agencies and services combining together for the one central purpose of benefiting fathers. 

WHY ARE FATHERS DESERVING OF ALL THIS MONEY?  BECAUSE, THE IMPLICATION IS, WOMEN ARE DOING A BAD JOB OF PARENTING AND NEED FATHERS TO STRAIGHTEN THEM OUT!

The statement of purpose included in the Memorandum of Agreement I referred to above tries to make the case that mothers are just not doing a good job of parenting.  So, apparently, they need fathers to straighten them out.  Here is a sample of the commentary:

"Children growing up in families headed by a single mother are five times more likely than children in two-parent families to live in poverty."

"Children who suffer from father absence are at a high risk for dropping out of school, incarceration, drug use and teen parenthood."

"Children experience higher academic achievement when their fathers are involved in their lives, whether or not their fathers live with them, including obtaining better grades and less likely incidence of repeating a grade."

Of course, wouldn't another way of saying this be: if fathers are not abusive towards their ex spouses and children and pay their child support, the outcome will improve for the children.  How hard is that? 

In my view, the real question should be, are 100% of fathers so inept at parenting, so retarded, that they REQUIRE the State to set up federally funded programs to show them how to do their job as fathers?  Where 90% of the people on welfare are single mothers who are the victims of domestic violence, isn't the fact that so many single mothers have stepped up to the plate and escaped their relationships with violent offenders a good thing?

Is the "give fathers custody at all costs, ask questions later" policy one we really want to follow given that the court programs are directly and deliberately drawing from pools of unfit fathers?

If the facts cited about single mothers are true, then shouldn't we be focused on providing resources directly to the children, rather than to the fathers who voluntarily abuse and neglect them?  Who says these children are "suffering" or even entitled to the luxury of two parents?  Why does the child require a violent, dangerous, unfit, father in his life who has drug and mental health problems?

Clearly, these questions have not played any significant role in the minds of the architects of these federally funded fatherhood programs.

So what does this mean for mothers who go to Family Court in Connecticut?  The answer is that grant programs funded through this fatherhood money kicks in to give fathers the advantage in Superior Court.  The way this happens is as follows. 

FATHERS GET SPECIAL ATTENTION!

When cases come before the court, there are personnel within Family Services whose sole job it is to find ways to benefit fathers and increase their access to their children, regardless of whether these fathers are abusive or not.  And remember, Family Services is not needs based, so anyone regardless of income is eligible. 

Also, as a mother, keep in mind that when you go to Family Court no one tells you, by the way, while you are receiving services from Family Relations, your ex husband is receiving double the support and double the services behind your back.  

These custody switching schemes begin with the following: 

"Court Negotiations:  This is a process in which a Family Relations Councilor meets with the non-custodial parent [father] at the time of the Court or Magistrate hearing in Hartford.  The sole function of the Family Relations Counselor in this setting is to discuss access and visitation issues as well as other concerns regarding the development of a parenting plan."  Yes, there is a statement that the non-custodial parent should be involved in this discussion, but--surprise, surprise--"In most instances the custodial parent is not available and follow-up meetings are necessary." 

FATHERS GET FREE LEGAL ADVICE!

And what will happen if the mother refuses to cooperate and agree to access? Family Relations will assist the father in obtaining free legal representation, in other words "provide information and support in navigating the formal court process to bring the access issue before Family Matters Court." Again, we have this deceptive language which is used to make these gender biased programs palatable--"problem solving", "access issues", when what we are really talking about is a custody switching scheme.

Do custodial parents, i.e. mothers, know these secret meetings are taking place, that all these services are conducted with a behind the scenes understanding that they are intended to benefit fathers alone? Do mothers understand that they are participating in this grant program and that the grant puts the mediator and the Family Relations Counselor on commission to find in favor of fathers and noncustodial parents? Do they know that when they walk through the office door of a Family Relations Counselor they are headed for an ambush?  No they don't. 

Of course, my question is whether a program that is meant to arbitrarily increase the number of noncustodial parents who "access" their kids and in the process take custody rights away from mothers has a legitimate government purpose. I think not!

FATHERS GET FREE SUPERVISED VISITATION!

 

Underlying much of this discussion is the understanding that a considerable number of the fathers involved in these programs are violent offenders who have caused harm and damage to their ex-wives and children.  For example, in regard to mediation there is a statement that mediation can be conducted with the parties in separate rooms.  Of course, this is what would occur in situations where there has been abuse. 

Further, there is a lengthy discussion of supervised visitation programs, but not to worry, because the people who run these programs don't think supervised visitation will be necessary for very long!  "The vast majority of cases move quickly to unsupervised access once the bond is re-established."  Oh, really!  These are people who have "either never developed a relationship with their child, or who have had their relationship severed."  And why is that?  Because they have been in jail?  Because they have been involved in drugs or illegal activities?  Your guess is as good as mine! 

What this all amounts to is that unarmed, untrained personnel end up supervising violent offenders' access to children. Here is their idea of security:

"One of the requirements articulated in the most recent Request for Proposal was for the organizations to follow the standards and guidelines for supervised visitation practices, as outlined by the Supervised Visitation Network (SVN).  The protocol utilized by all current direct services providers is a staggered arrival and departure procedure to ensure the safety of the participants.  if requested by the  custodial parent, third parties can be utilized for the drop-off and pick-up of the child to the agency.  In addition, the agencies have telephones in each room where the services occur, in case of an emergency, they are able to contact help.  Further, one of the agencies utilizes panic buttons on their staff that would alert the local police department if an incident occurs."

A telephone call didn't do much to save the Powell children when their elderly, overweight visitation "supervisor" brought them to Josh Powell's house.  He chopped them up with an ax and blew the house up while the "supervisor" stood there chatting with 911 operators."

These subsidized supervised visitation programs appear to be only available to fathers who are getting assistance with their court cases.   In contrast, supervised visitation programs extort tens of thousands of dollars from protective mothers such as Susan Skipp and Sunny Kelly for access to their children, while fathers receive the same services for free.  In particular, Sunny Kelly, who was charged with PAS and lost custody to a diagnosed psychopath and child rapist, was charged $10,000 per month in a non-therapeutic setting to see her son.  She can't afford such extraordinary amounts of money, so she has not seen her son in a year.

FATHERS GET FREE COUNSELING!

Through the Families in Transition program, Fathers are also provided free counseling in order to remove the barriers which limit access to their children.  Of course, I have problem with this kind of wording.  These are not families any longer, if they ever were families.  Some father's were never married to the mother of their children.  Others are divorced, so there is no family in the traditional sense.  What this terminology reflects is the insistence upon expanding father's ability to control and manipulate his ex partner and children despite the fact that both parents have gone their separate ways. 

Or, as the grant application chooses to put it, the purpose of this counseling is to establish the father's relationship with children he hasn't seen in a long time and assist the child in "gain[ing] an important level of  comfort with the reintroduced parent."  It can also be used as a springboard to making referrals to other services such as "parent education, substance abuse evaluation, treatment, and testing."  Right, these children of single mothers would really suffer without their drug addicted fathers in their lives.

Under the laws of the State of Connecticut, a parent cannot be ordered into counseling or treatment after the divorce is closed.  Yet these programs routinely order mothers into treatment in order to promote access and visitation for fathers.  According to federal law, the Access and Visitation grant programs do not provide for involuntary counseling, advocacy, or therapy.  Yet this is exactly what the CSSD programs are doing with the money.  For more information see the following link:

http://www.acf.hhs.fov/programs/css/resource/final-rule-150-grants-to-states-for-access-and-visitation-programs
 

MAKE NO MISTAKE, THIS ABUSE OF WOMEN HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR A LONG TIME AND IT IS ENTRENCHED IN THE LEGAL AND SOCIAL CULTURE OF THE STATE OF CONNECTICUT

Returning to the grant application I started this article with what does that mean "renewal" application?  How long has this been going on?  According to the letter accompanying this grant application, "The Access and Visitation Grant will provide Connecticut with the opportunity to continue and expand the program that has been in place for over ten years."  In fact, the Connecticut Judicial Branch has been receiving this fatherhood funding to strengthen and support Fathers in their custody battles since 1997.  This is well over a decade during which considerable numbers of women have increasingly reported losing custody of their children to abusers in custody battles in family court that have been riddled with fraud, graft, and corruption.  

The result is a battleground where the State of Connecticut, funded with millions of dollars of federal money, is attacking and destroying the lives of innocent women and children.  This has got to stop, right now. 

WHAT DO WOMEN NEED TO KNOW

What mothers need to understand is that the Federal Government is only going to pay the Court to maintain services if mothers lose their court cases.  Mothers have absolutely no chance of winning because the checks are only cut to agencies that assist fathers--dysfunctional and dangerous ones.

But for the purposes of justifying the payments, the CSSD pilots are enrolling mothers involuntarily in Fatherhood programs without telling them, and then counting them off to the Federal Government as "parties served."  And since the mothers do not know they are enrolled and are not receiving services, they are not provided with the surveys referenced in the grant reports that state everyone is so pleased with the programs and the outcome of their cases. 

The programs scuttle all of the mother's due process rights and put CSSD administrators in charge of burying any evidence that might hinder a father's chances of increasing his parenting time and rights.  Otherwise, if there were a decrease in father's custodial time, then the feds would not pay up and that court administrator will lose his or her job.