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Friday, February 17, 2017


"[Family Court corruption] is happening on a massive scale and everyone involved knows it."

"We live in a country where kids are for sale and being traded for dollars in a multi billion dollar a year industry."


Stories of family court abuse and corruption are so sad, and yet I know, as far fetched as they sound and as far as our imaginations have to reach to believe them, they are not only possible but actually very common in family court; in short, they are the truth. 

I am an all American boy. Eagle Scout, football, baseball, ice hockey, outdoorsman, hard worker, and loving father to two amazing young women. I salute the flag, respect the law, love my country and would lay my life down if needed to defend the freedom this country has guaranteed me. 

Five years ago I would have never believed what was going on was possible on the scale it is happening at. I would have wrote stories like this off as over exaggerated accounts and one sided half truths. If I did actually look at it and saw that the story was entirely accurate I would have written it off as unfortunate and blamed it on system error and chalked it up to a rare event and certainly not the norm. 

One thing that has been the hardest for me to accept in everything I have been through during my journey through hell with the family court system here is not so much what the court has done to me and my children. While the things they have done are horrible. The things they have put my kids through and continue to put us through are horrible. 

The hardest thing for me to come to terms with is that this is not the exception but the rule. 

This is happening on a massive scale and everyone involved knows it. 

It's seems so far fetched that someone removed from it who has never seen it first hand and been through it would never believe it. This stuff is done out in the open and no one seems to care besides the ones getting ruined. 

The system is in power to serve as the check and balance, to oversee, to right these wrongs when committed know what's going on and they do nothing about it to deter or stop it. 

In the beginning of my trip through hell I shared 50/50 custody (for which I spent my entire net worth to get). There came a time and a situation I'm not going to get into in a public forum where my children were being abused by their mother. I had no more money to funnel into my attorneys pockets but scraped and found enough to take this issue to court. The mediator completely blew off the issue and essentially said go to co parenting again like that will help stop the abuse. What they mean to say is you need to get comfortable with the idea of the thing you hold most precious and near to your heart being abused. (I'm talking major abuse here). 

Anyway the judge sided with the mediator and the opposing counsel and put the order in temporarily denying my plea for help despite police reports confirming my claim. It was sent to trial. 

In speaking with my attorney after that hearing it was as if she didn't care, as if she was numb to what had just happened. I said what now? How do I help my kids? Her response to me was "you're out of money in escrow. Pay me $100,000 and you'll have your kids" I said I don't have another $100,000 and she said then get real comfortable with the order because that's what it takes. I asked if she was saying I could buy my kids and she just looked at me as if to say yep that's exactly what I'm saying. 

We live in a country where kids are for sale and being traded for dollars in a multi billion dollar a year industry. 

To anyone who hasn't been through it I'm sure I sound nuts and to everyone who has been through it I know you're nodding your head saying "Yep". We need to stand up and put a stop to this evil that is allowed to happen. My case doesn't end here the but this is a small taste of my life and my personal experience with the family court system. My heart goes out to anyone and everyone who has been abused by this system. 

Hold your head up and stay strong. 

They can't ignore us forever.

Monday, February 6, 2017


In the early hours of January 19, 2017 a troop of six FBI agents banged on invest-igative journalist Paul Boyne's door in Virginia where he lives with his elderly parents who are in their 80s.  What were they there for?  The agents had a search and seizure warrant allowing them to take all of Mr. Boyne's computers, computer equipment, and related items based upon the laughable allegation that he had been cyberbullying, stalking or harassing family court Judge Elizabeth Buzzoto.   

From what it looks like, the CT Department of Justice headed by Deirdre Daly, was able to contact a judge in Virginia and obtain this warrant.  What is ironic about this prompt action on behalf of Judge Elizabeth Buzzoto is that in the past few years, dozens of family court victims have submitted complaints of Civil Rights violations and ADA rights violations to Attorney Deirdre Daly, all of which she has routinely ignored.  

Somehow to Attorney Deirdre Daly a family court judge's welfare and rights are considerably more important than the rights of citizens of the State of Connecticut?  Why is that?  Why does Attorney Deirdre Daly go all out to protect a judge, but ignores citizens?  Is it because she doesn't think average Connecticut citizens are worth her time?  If so, that's pretty disgusting.  

In regard to the charges leveled against Paul Boyne, they are clearly ridiculous and absurd.  As many people may be aware, Mr. Paul Boyne is an investigative journalist and political satirist who has spoken up for many abused and injured family court litigants who have been unjustly treated and tortured by the Connecticut Family Court system. His courageous and outspoken reports to Connecticut State officials and employees of the Connecticut Judicial Branch have been a source of comfort and solace to family court victims who really have had nobody else willing to stand up for them and speak out on their behalf. 

In addition to his investigative work, Mr. Boyne has long used Facebook and Twitter to satirize and parody the legal system, most particularly in regard to Connecticut Family Court Judge Elizabeth Bozzuto.  Frequently, the content of these communications could be characterized as very offensive and and anti-semitic.  For me, as a person with Jewish heritage, I'd say that Mr. Paul Boyne's tweets are extremely offensive to anyone who is Jewish or who abhors religious bigotry.  

At one point, I confronted him on this, and he stated that he was making these anti-semitic slurs to send a message about family court. It isn't one that I would agree with. However, based upon the first Amendment, Mr. Boyne has every right to freedom of expression.  Along with Evelyn Beatrice Hall I would also state, "I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."  In essence, what he has done is no different in many ways to what has appeared regularly in "Mad Magazine", The Daily Show, or Saturday Night Live.   

It particularly concerns me that in order to obtain her warrant, Attorney Deirdre Daly and her allies essentially lied to the judge in Virginia.  Judge Elizabeth Buzzoto is a public figure--you cannot characterize a journalist's satirical challenges towards her as a form of cyberbullying.  Cyberbullying by its very nature can only occur when you have two people who are on an equal footing in regard to social status and power.  Clearly, Judge Buzzoto wields a level of power and authority well beyond that of Journalist Paul Boyne, and as such it is disingenuous to the extreme, if not deliberately misleading to say that Mr. Boyne cyberbullied her in any way.  

What is particularly absurd about the CT Judicial Branch's decision to go after Paul Boyne is that he is not particularly good at parody or satire.  My guess is, in fact, that he turns off most of the people who read his work, and that, if he's trying to get people to agree with his views regarding family court, he is most likely shooting himself right in the foot and alienating the majority of his audience with what he writes. 

Still, despite the obvious failure of these satirical accounts and the universal disregard in which they are held by most people, the CT Judicial Branch is so intolerant of any kind of criticism that it felt moved to respond with such harsh and draconian measures.  

That's just pathetic.  

Further, Mr. Paul Boyne has pointed out that his writing is fundamentally protected speech.  Thus, he brought to my attention the freedom of speech case U.S. v. Cassidy (2011) in which Judge Roger W. Titus ruled in favor of the defendant citing the following point, that "Under the First Amendment 'Congress shall make no law...abridging the freedom of speech" and he stated further, "from our nation's founding there has been a tradition of protecting anonymous speech, particularly anonymous political or religious speech."  

Judge Titus went further in support of freedom of speech to state, "Moreover, the First Amendment protects speech even when the subject or manner of expression is uncomfortable and challenges conventional religious beliefs, political attitudes or standards of good taste." He also stated, "the Supreme court has consistently classified emotionally distressing or outrageous speech as protected, especially where that speech touches on matters of political, religious or public concern. This is because 'in public debate our own citizens must tolerate insulting, and even outrageous speech in order to provide adequate breathing space to the freedoms protected by the First Amendment."  

So what occurred here with a posse of six FBI agents barging their way into a private home and confiscating Mr. Paul Boyne's computer equipment was a complete violation of the law.  

But what can I say.  As Family Court victims we have regularly seen examples where Judges, U.S. Attorney's General, and Attorneys violate federal and state law at will and there appears to be no consequence to such behavior.  Meanwhile, these very same persons come before the Judiciary Committee, the Connecticut Media and Public and go boohoo and act as though they are the victims. What a joke!

In terms of the future of our freedoms as American citizens in the State of Connecticut in regard to Freedom of Speech, there is also the concern that the Connecticut Judicial Branch is using Mr. Paul Boyne's case as a means to investigate and silence its political enemies.  

More specifically, now that U.S. Attorney Deirdre Daly and her pals have all of Mr. Boyne's computers, they can then snoop into all of his communications with family court activists and find out all the details regarding their plans for political organizing.  Most notable in this regard is that the orders seizing these computers extends to the year 2014 and on.  As most of you know, it was in 2014 that the Coalition for Connecticut Family Court Reform came together and pressed for improvements in the area of GAL reform.  

The very same situation occurred with activist Ted Taupier who was criminally charged as the result of a private expression of frustration in regard to Judge Elizabeth Buzzoto which was sent in an email to close friends and never to the Judge herself.  This was also used as grounds to seize all of Ted Taupier's computers which again included private communications among advocates working for judicial reform.  

The search and seizure warrant  for Mr. Paul Boyne makes specific reference to wanting information in regard to a "Mr. Paul A. Boyne and others."  

Who are these mysterious others?  Could this mean anyone who might have the gall to criticize the Connecticut Judicial Branch and hold it to account and ask that employees of the Branch itself obey the law in the way that every other Connecticut Citizen is required to?  

Probably "yes"!  

Since 2014, many of those who testified about the harm and damage they endured from the Connecticut Family Court system have experienced retaliation.   If you are one of the "others" Mr. Boyne's legal documents referred to, one of those who testified or criticized, you have every reason to be afraid, to be very, very afraid.  It would appear that no one, not one single voice is allowed to challenge what many people see as the fraudulent, racketeering scheme that is the Connecticut Family Court system. 

Whose home will FBI agents break into next?  Will it be yours or yours?

Tuesday, January 24, 2017


Sometimes I wonder how it ever got to the point where my marriage ended up with a divorce.  Then I look at the way President Obama behaves towards his wife; the light shines and I figure it out.  

More than anything else, President Obama's behavior towards his wife provides an example for all men of how they should behave towards their wives. If they want to stay married and they respect the sanctity of marriage. What he does is on each and every occasion when it is the least bit appropriate, President Obama makes public statements at social events and in person about how much he is grateful for his wife, and how much he holds her in esteem, and how he places her first in all of his considerations.  This is the secret for any man to nurturing and maintaining a healthy marriage.  

My father was exactly the same way.  Throughout my childhood, and indeed, throughout my entire life, I observed my father on frequent occasions verbalize to all of us in our family how much he loved my mother, how much he held her in the highest esteem, and how he considered her first in all things.  

Perhaps he did not always live up to that ideal--and sometimes he'd be caught out on something she didn't approve of and he'd walk around looking all guilty.  But ultimately, this was his ideal, even when he didn't feel like it.  

At appropriate times, during important family events, my father always took the opportunity to thank my mother, to reflect on the special moments of their lives together, and to restate again his commitment to her as the most important person in his life.  Those moments when he did that always made me feel proud.  I say this with great admiration because his devotion to my mother was often quite extraordinary given that my mother wasn't always the easiest person to get along with.  

Still, my point is that he died a married man and lived to see his 60th wedding anniversary.  

How is that done?  It is done first by sticking by that promise you made to have and to hold from this day forward.  Funny to hear that on a blog devoted to divorce!  

My father made his marriage as all men do.  They make it by insisting upon it.  They make it by respecting it.  They make it by valuing it.  They make it by considering it their top priority.  They make it by articulating to themselves and to the world that this woman, or this person who is my partner, is more important to me than anyone else in the world.  This person has fine qualities which I admire and that I cherish and I would never be the person I am today were it not for her.  

My father married my mother on his birthday.  He was 23 and she was 19.  They actually met when she was 16 and he was 20.  And can you imagine they were together well into their 80s.  

I always think, and I believe my parents conveyed to me, that the reason my parents chose his birthday for their wedding date was because their marriage made my father the man he became; it literally gave birth to him as a personality and as a human being.  My mother, literally, was a gift to my father on the day of his birth, and thereby gave birth to him.  The date alone was an indication to their children how important our mother was to my father and to the family.  

So when I look at my own marriage and why it failed, I would start with the fact that my ex-husband went around complaining about me in public, rather than demonstrating the kind of respect President Obama knows how to show towards his wife.  He would trot around that old chestnut that our misogynistic society still falls for, i.e. "She doesn't feed me!" as if he wasn't quite capable of feeding himself, as if we weren't both equally pulling our weight when it came to earning a living, and so demanding I do all the housework on top of that was rather immature and thoroughly entitled.  

What gets me, though, is that we still live in a world where people are willing to actually give a complaining husband the time of day.  It is as if folks love to aid and abet the destruction of a marriage and egg the guy on, even in Churches.  

In fact, when I finally filed for divorce one of the first things I did was collect written affidavits from Church members who stated that my ex would come to Church committee meetings and talk trash about me.  These were the very same Church members who came to my wedding and lifted up their hands in agreement that they committed themselves to supporting and encouraging my ex husband and me in our marriage.  

Talking about lying hypocrisy.  

Of course, that is not surprising given the pastor of the Church.  This was a fellow who took pains to hide his wife and pretend that he had nothing to do with her.  His behavior was so bad that it took me a few years before I figured out who his wife was.  I guess the spirit of a Church leader infiltrates the Church community and creates a group of imitators; many of the marriages in that congregation ended up with divorce as well.  Of course, he stayed married--it wouldn't have been respectable for a pastor to do anything different. But as I say, not everyone who is married is actually married.  He used to say, "I choose to love her." as if someone was pulling one of his teeth out.  I'm not sure that actually counts as a marriage.

What I am saying is actually very simple and straightforward when you think of it and it doesn't seem to have take President Obama that much to have figured it out and acted upon it.  But look around you in our culture where 50% of marriages end in divorce.  How many people do you know actively engage in the manner of President Obama and verbally articulate in public and often how much they respect and appreciate their wives.  

To be honest, I don't see it happening that often, and to me that says it all about where the failure lies.  

You may be saying right now, oh that isn't fair.  Why do guys have to do all the work here.  I'm sorry.  That's just the way it is.  My father used to say to us kids, "If your Mom isn't happy, no one is happy."  Mothers are the very heart and foundation of the family.  If you break that heart, there is nothing left for anyone but the fragments and the tossed about pieces.  That's why the men need to straighten out, step up to the plate, and do the job they were intended for.  If they choose not to do it, then they are responsible for the consequences.  

That is particularly true for those scum of the earth men who snatch custody from mothers and deny them all contact with their children.  There is a special place in hell for those kinds of men.

My mentor in college, a poetry instructor, used to talk about the kinds of people who could look at a statue, an image, or a symbol and fail to understand what it meant even though it was right in front of them.  Here we have our President (I haven't quite gotten used to the fact that he is a former President) demonstrating right before our eyes the proper way to behave, and yet so few have actually picked up on it.  You'd think it would be obvious, but I guess it isn't.  Often wisdom is a distilled quality, and when finally acquired, it is too late.